Yes, yes. It started already. The hiccups. The formal 50-50 arrangement hasn;t even started yet and I am already getting abused by Spike. The other day i received a whole barrel of texts from him and it's just frustrating me. I won't repeat them or bang on about them too much, I am bored of it all.
He just will never change his perspective. He just will never move on.
I am still shocked at the anger I have towards him, and it seems to grow with every bad encounter I have with him. I never got over how our marriage ended, and it has caused so much of the anger I still experience today. Because he broke his vows to me, he cheated. He broke a part of me in doing that, that I have never quite gotten over. He cheated and he thinks his shit don't stink.
It is exhausting.
I had such a great great time today with the girls - the school holidays are almost at an end, and yesterday I was just so stressed and wasn;t having fun with them, so I just prayed and asked God to bless me with enough patience and motivation to enjoy some quality time with my girls. And he did! It was a fantastic hot summers day today and we went to Maraetai beach, I used to go there alot as a kid. The sun was hot and the water was cool, we had a blast together. Spice jumped off a wharf into the sea, and Sugar was happily playing in the sand. We had fun. They behaved. It was wonderful!
I am so blessed to have such lovley girls.
On another note, I am going to give up smoking! I'm counting down to my quit date so will be starting a new blog about that.
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